Delusions

Beautiful,
Sable Eyes,
Dark lashes, and brows.
Intense.

Deep, dark bitter sweet chocolate
man...

You know not were you
come from and today
you know less of were you are going.

Competent to go to college,
Afraid,
how many babies will it take
to fill the void.
Blame the girl...
It took two.
Love does not pay the bills.
You are living on borrowed time.
Hands outstretched, can I have, will you give....
Where is yours?
No just the babies.
They have to eat and they don't stay babies forever.
Deepening the wound.
I see your hidden pain,
at least you like to think its hidden.
You are that sweet boy of 3 alone in your
room, crying for your mother.
She never comes to console you.
To tell you monsters are a manifestation
of your imagination.
If you make it you can kill it.

Another drive by,
yellow tape,
blood on the ground.
This is the life "Oakland California".
Did it make sense?
fallen friend, or is it foe?
they have fallen.
A mother sobbing for her loss.
How many have you lost.
Is there something that I can change.
Is there something that they can change.
What will it take?
Standing next to the hole.
Thoughts, "why can't it be me".
Because the more you want it the less you will get it....
Tears, Sobs, sadness.
I want something different,
but I do not know what I want.

Opportunity is passing you by.
You sit on the stoop and watch.
Put that smoke down,
wash your face,
put on clean clothes,
change something and
not just the channel.

I want to be a rapper,
make some money,
change my life.
Everyone wants to be a rapper,
make some money, and change their life.
You are still on the stoop.
Grandma, always said
trash is trash not matter whose yard its in.

Delusions of grandeur.
I have so much power.
The system is watching me.
They want to see what I am doing.
I am like some other unsung hero of the
rap game.
He did not have a full search and seizure.
Is that the day you became a man.
Or is that the day you realized you now have on
shackles. I hear them clinking with every step you make.

Conspiracy, my assss.......
you have the power to do what you like,
but you exercise no movement.
You locked yourself out, and you are
sitting in the yard being fed shit in the dark.
Are you growing....
What court gesture are you following today.
Does he wear the courts hat?

when you make no demands of yourself, you can make
no demands of your neighborhood.
Walk into a
store and watch a friend/foe steal an old
mans bike and you say nothing. What are you really changing?
Open your eyes...
You are equally part of the problem.
You have forgotten the golden rule.
"Do on to others" oh that does not count.
Someone stole your bike, and nobody said anything.
But the system is conspiring against you because you
have done.....
you will be....
I am.....

Delusions,
who are you,
what do you stand for,
stand for nothing and you fall
for everything.
do you know you are not standing.
You have fallen and you can't get up.
There are no helping hands reaching for you.
You have Youth,
You have ability....
It won't last forever.

You are crouching in a darkened
corner. Pretending to stand.

Pull up your pants.
It's not "whities fault".
Many people died to give you
the opportunity to be
DELUSIONAL.

They were eaten by dogs,
hung from tree's,
homes burned,
families murdered...
But you were given a right
to be a, "PERSON".
ACT LIKE ONE.....

Stop thinking that everyone
sees you, and make yourself known.
Speak out loud, with your mouth,
In words that we all can hear.